The Housemartins I Can't Put My Finger on It

As martin said to xanthe
As they played with wooden toys
You may have wendys playhouse
But where the heels your boys?
As paul said to fifi
As they eyed each other up
You may have better plimsoles
But you cant pee standing up

And Id like to take the time to bite
Their neck and make it bleed
Or maybe I could cut holes in their
Daddys harris tweed

And I cant put my finger on it
Maybe its something in their food
And I cnat put my finger on it
All I know is christ wouldve sued

As sharon said to jamie
As they sat down for a chat
If you think Im cooking dinner
Well, prepare to eat dead rat

As debbie said to alex
As they held hands in the park
How come you wear rupert check
When you think youre so hard

I shouldve done his land rover
To let him know Id been
Instead I wrote f off
On the dirt across his screen

And I cant put my finger on it
Maybe its something in their food
And I cnat put my finger on it
All I know is christ wouldve sued

I wish Id let them know that I was here
A drop of arsenic in the wine
Sulphuric acid in the beer